Pass the ADHD pills

Why do I need ADHD pills?

I need them to give me that extra pep that only legal meth can do!

....Yea, I'm just kidding.

But really, I can understand why moms want to take their kids' ADHD pills!  There is just so much shit a mom needs to get done in a day and not enough time or energy for it all!

The beginning of this weekend has been a nightmare.  I should have been going to work for a 12 hour night shift...but taking Monster to the hospital for an asthma attack prevented that.  In light of the asthma attack I'm thinking of all the shenanigans I need to get done to make our home less dusty, germy, and just generally un-nasty. 

What am I doing?  I'm not cleaning.  I'm watching Bruno

freaking hilarious

 .... and blogging with no pants on (true story).  My lack of pants is due to cleaning up dog shit and giving dogs a bath at 1am immediately after coming home from the hospital.  That's where all my energy went!  To cleaning dog shit!  I can't even find the energy to go upstairs and put new pants on!  Let alone scrub the house down!

I would love to naturally be all

but I suffer from procrastination and just being lazy.

Ugh, and if I think going upstairs to get pants is hard...  I should be going to Wal-Mart to buy a present for Monster's friend's birthday AND buying a few groceries because for some reason my fridge seems to constantly be bare.  But...that requires energy. 

My procrastination and laziness is making me a horrible mother.  I bet this feeling is what drives mothers to want to take drugs.  As moms we want to have everything perfect.  We want to make sure that our families are taken care of and that they are happy.  When we are lacking we become desperate... Desperation makes us do awful things.  So, before I become desperate I better find my own ways of dealing with feeling like a crappy mom.  

So far, I've found there are only two cures for my procrastination and lack of energy.

One not giving a fuck about the little things...  So what my kitchen isn't perfectly organized!  It's bleached down with germ killing chemicals...who cares if it takes me ten minutes to find the lid to a tupperware bowl!

The second cure...  Coffee.

God Bless Coffee!!!






Disclaimer: Don't take this as a cry for help. This is purely for entertainment...  politically incorrect entertainment. My personal opinion is I don't believe it's acceptable for any one to do drugs not prescribed by a doctor.